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Sam Bo-Jam and His 
African Colony 



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Sam Bo-jam, and His 
African Colony 

A Negro Farce in Three Scenes 



By 

JAY CLAY POWERS 

Author of "If I Only Had a Million? 
"A Day in Court" etc. 



BOSTON 

WALTER H. BAKER & CO. 

1916 






Sam Bo-jam, and His African Colony 



CHARACTERS 



(As originally produced in San Antonio, Texas, by the au:hc.) 



Scottish Rite Cathedral, 
Jan. 28-2Q, iqib. 



Temple theatre, 
Feb. II, iqib. 



Pa Ermeeline - 
Ma Ermerline - 
Sassy \ the Ermerline \ 
Sissy j* twins ) 

Abe Jackson - - - - 
Eph Johnson - 
Sam P>o-jam, an African colonizer 
Golden Rodd, an octoroon • 
Queen Lukattiaxkilli - 
Ho jo, the Prime Minister 
Hot-foot, a irnge . 
A Herald - 
Joshy-oshy, the Queen' 1 's fool, 
Dashem, the executioner, 
Bohunkiis. a soothsayer 
Uaptain Tuff, of the royal guar 
First Guardsman 
Second Guardsman 
Third Guardsman 
Royal Dancing Girls 
Train Bearers - 



Mrs. C. W. Gordon. 
Mrs. H. W. Weber. 
f Lucille Morris. 
t Lillian Wagner. 
Mrs. Joseph La Franc. 
Mrs. E. B. Watters. 
, Mrs. H. B. Vodrie. 
Miss Ethel Hendricks. 
Mrs. C. A. Soule. 
Mrs. Beno Kavton. 
Mrs. J. C. Bradley. 
Miss Helen Gordon. 
Mrs. P. H. Dial. 



Mrs.W. G. Kingsbury. 
Mrs. John Culpepper. 
fMiss Anna Culpepper. 
1 Mis3 Helen Kingsbury. 
Miss Bess Denison. 
Miss Loys Snodgrass. 
Miss Ann Noble. 
Miss Tula Roberson. 
Miss Lucy McGregor. 
Miss Earl Winn. 
Miss Annie Watters. 
Mrs. Walter Roach. 
Miss Cecil Pike. 
Mrs. J. West Nichols. 
Miss P uline Estes. 
Mrs. Blu McGowen. 
Miss Kittie Holden. 
- Miss Eileen Smith. 

Miss Vela Adrian. 
Misses Helen Kingsbury and Anna Culpepper. 
Dorothy Carr and Norris Reed 



Guests of the Erraerlines ; the royal guard ; ladies and gentlemen 
of the court ; train-bearers ; dancing girls. 



SYNOPSIS 

Time.— Present. Place. — Texas and Africa, 

Scene I. — Ermeiiine home in Texas. 

The birthday party. 
Scene II. — The African jungle. 

A month later. 
Scene III. — Lukattiankilli's court. 

The next day. 

Note. — Lukattiankilli is pronounced Loo- catty- an- killy. 




Copyright, 1916, by Walter 'H. Baker & Co. 
©JI.D 44090 

JUN -o iyi6 



Sam Bo-jam, and His African Colony 



SCENE I 

SCENE. — Living-room of the Ermerlines. The stage is un- 
carpeted and bare of furniture, except for a number of 
chairs standing against the walls. Doors at back c, at R., 
and at l. 

{After rise of curtain, Pa Ermerline, a respectable old ne- 
gro y enters, r., smacking his mouth. He dusts off chairs 
with his bandanna.) 

Pa E. Lordy, but dem goosies sho' am roastin' to a turn. 
{Calls.) Maw Ermerline ! {Pause.') Maw Ermerline ! 

Ma Ermerline {off l.). Yas, ole man, whut is it? 

Pa E. Ain't dem chillun mos' ready? 

Ma E. {off l.). Yas, indeedy ! . . . How dem goosies 
doin' ? 

Pa E. Dey's mos' done, and dey sho' smells beautiful. 
. . . Hit's 'bout time de chillun's comp'ny wus arrivin'. 

Enter Ma E., l., a respectable old negro mammy. 

Ma E. Well, youse dressed, and I'm dressed, and Sassy 
and Sissy's ready, too, so let de comp'ny come on. 

Pa E. How does de chillun look in deir new finery? 

Ma E. Deedy, honey, dey looks and steps jest like two 
peacocks, dey's dat purty and proud. Dey's de loveliest two 
twins dat ebber had a eighteenf birfday party. Yas, sa;h 
(Sassy and Sissy laugh off l.) Here dey come now. 

Enter Sassy and Sissy, l., dressed fust alike in bright colors. 
They turn around and display their new dresses for in- 
spection. 

Sassy. How do we look, Paw ? 

Sissy. Yes, Paw, how do we look ? 

Pa E. Sweet as drippin' honey. Come kiss yo' Pappy. 

3 



4 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

(Sassy and Sissy run to Pa E. and kiss him. Noise and 
laughter of guests heard off, back.') 

Ma E. Dar comes yo' comply. Run, chillun, and make 
'urn welcome. 

Sassy. Yes, Maw. 
Sissy. We shore will ! 

(They run to door, back c, and admit several young negro 
couples, who are laughing and talking. The young folks 
greet Sassy, Sissy, Ma and Pa E. ?ioisily.) 

Ma E. {clapping her hands). Shet up, chillun, — jest for a 
minute — and listen to me! (The ?ioise subsides.) Paw, you 
go look, agin, to dem roast goosies ! Sassy and Sissy, you-all 
stay here in de receivin' line. And you young folks follow me 
into de undressin' room, and remove yo' hats and wraps. 

(Pa E. exits r. The young people, laughing and talking, 
follow Ma E. off l. and exeunt. Sassy and Sissy come 
toe.) 

Sissy. Whut's the matter, Sassy ? You look disappointed. 

Sassy. I give that triflin' Abe Jackson a special invite to 
our party, and I don't b'lieve he's a-comin'. 

Sissy. It don't look as if Eph Johnson was goin* to show 
up, neither. (Knocking is heard at door, back c.) Maybe 
that's them now ! 

Sassy. Come in ! 

Enter Abe Jackson and Eph Johnson, back c. Abe is 
flashily dressed ; Eph wears ridiculous clothes. Abe 
goes to Sassy at r. c; Eph to Sissy at l. c. 

Abe. Good-evenin', dearie. 
- Sassy. I'm so glad you come, Abe. 
Eph. How's mah baby? 
Sissy. Just dandy, Eph. 
Abe. You-all shore does look cute. 
Eph. Yas, cute as de little hosses on a merry-go-round. 

Enter Pa E., door r. 

PaE. Howdy do, Abe? 
Abe. Fine, Pa Ermerline. 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 5 

Pa E. Howdy do, Eph ? 

Eph. Scrumbumptious. 

Pa E. Kin you-all smell de roast goose? 

Abe. Yes, indeed, sah. 

Pa E. Kin you smell hit, Eph ? 

Eph. Kin a mule kick? Well, I reckon. 

Pa E. I got to baste 'urn a little more. 'Scuse me. . . . 
Make dem gals ob mine start a little song and put some life 
into dis ole shack. \Exit, r. 

Abe. Go ahead and sing, Sassy. 

Eph. Bust loose, Sissy. 

{Orchestra plays ; Abe to r. and sits ; Eph. to l. and sits ; 
Sassy and Sissy sing good, lively duet ; when the chorus 
is reached, Abe and EvHjoin Sassy and Sissy / the guests 
enter, l., in couples, and all sing and step the chorus ; 
Ma E. enters, l., and Pa E., r., and come dozvn ; they 
beat time and sing chorus with the others. At conclusion 
of chorus they all cheer. If encored, line up on stage 
and repeat.} 

Enter, back a, Sam Bo- jam, a well-groomed, business negro. 
The guests make way for Sam, and he comes doivn c. 

Sam. Ladies and gentlemen : pardon my rudeness in walk- 
ing in unannounced. I knocked at the door several times but 
could get no response, as you were all singing. 

Pa E. Youse excusable, sah. Youse excusable. 

Sam. Are you Mr. Ermerline? 

Pa E. I is, sah. And yo' name's ? 

Sam. Sam Bo-jam, African colonizer, at your service, sir. 
With your permission, I'd like to present a business proposition 
to all present. 

Pa E. All right, sah ; we'll hear it. . . . Chillun, pull 
out dem cheers, and eb'rybody set down and make deyseves 
comfable while we hears dis gintleman's projec'. (Each per- 
former gets a chair ; they set the chairs in rows, leaving an 
aisle down c. Pa E. sits r., next to him sits Sassy, Abe, 
Sissy, Eph, Ma E. and Sam, in the order named. The guests 
sit back of this first row.} Now, den, eb'rybody 'pears to be 
easy. Go ahead, Mr. Jo-jam and 'splain yo'sef. 

Sam. Bo-jam. Sam Bo-jam, African colonizer. 

Pa E. Yas, sah ; yas, sah. 'Scuse me. 



6 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

Sam. I am of pure African lineage and I'm proud of it. 
Should I so desire I have the right to be called Count Bo-jam, 
as I hold letters patent from the queen 

Eph. Look a here, nigger, whut kinder dope you been in- 
halm 7 ? 

Abe. Shet up, Eph ! 

Sam. As I was saying I have letters patent 

Eph. I got a pair of patent leathers at home, mahsef, but I 
don't go 'round braggin' 'bout it. 

Ma E. Hish, Eph ! 

Sam. Letters patent, that confer on me the rank of Count. 

Sassy. Oh, Paw, we've got a real, live count in our house. 

Eph. And his name is Noah. 

Sam. Why do you say my name is Noah ? 

Eph. Noah Count. 

Sissy. Eph, will you please shut up ? 

Eph. Sartainly. Go on with yo' tale, Noah Count Bo-jam. 

Pa E. Eph, ef you interrupts agin, you don't git no roast 
goose. 

Eph. Den I takes no chances. 

( Ties bandanna over his mouth.) 

Pa E. Go on, please, Count Bo-jam. 

Sam. Well, her majesty Queen Lukattiankilli 

Abe. Queen who ? 

Eph. Now, Abe, you shet up ! 

Sam. Lukattiankilli, Africa's widowed queen, has given to 
me letters patent that give to me, in addition to my title of 
Count, two million acres of fertile land, with the understand- 
ing that I am to colonize the land with American negroes. 
My ship, The Royal Shark, is now in Galveston Harbor, tak- 
ing on board negroes from Oklahoma and Texas. To each 
negro male will be awarded one hundred acres of land, a house 
to live in and the first year's supplies. As soon as we get the 
required number of negroes aboard, which will be about day 
after to-morrow, we set sail for Africa, there to be received by 
our rightful sovereign. 

Pa E. That's goin' some ! 

Ma E. And youse 'spectin' some of us to go 'long wid you 
on dis royal ship ? 

Sam. All of you that want to. 

Abe. Whut we got to pay ? 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 7 

Sam. Absolutely nothing. We transport you and your 
effects absolutely free. 

Pa E. Don't eben hab to wuk our passage? 

Sam. No. We have a native crew. All you- all will have 
to do is to recline at your ease, eat and drink your fill, during 
the entire voyage. What do you think of the scheme, Mr. 
Ermerline ? 

Pa E. Hit sounds good. 

Eph. Too good to be true. 

Ma E. Now, Eph 

Eph. Roast goose, or no goose, I can't keep mah mouf shet. 

Sam. I am very willing to answer any questions you may 
care to ask. 

Eph. Dis Majesty ob yoahs — Queen Look-at-it-an' -kill-it — 
did I comprehend you to say she's a widder? 

Sam. Yes. 

Eph. Winter oats or summer grass? 

Sam. How's that ? 

Eph. That is, is her husband livin' or dead ? 

Sam. Killed in battle. 

Abe. Does we have to do any fightin* ? 

Sam. No. 

Eph. How's Look- at-it-an' -kill-it for looks? Hab she got 
a good figur' ? 

Sam. She is the fairest lady, and the most beautifully 
formed, in all Africa. 

Ma E. Whut erbout de rest ob de popilation ? 

Sam. They are but little inferior to the queen. 

Ma E. Ain't they all awful black? 

Sam. Not in our section of Africa. Even a short stay in 
our section bleaches the skin of an American negro and makes 
him three shades whiter. 

Sassy. Maw, let's go along with Count Bo-jam. 

Sissy. Let's go, Paw. 

Pa E. Me and yo' mammy's too ole for new doin's — and 
you chiiiun can't go widout us ; but ef we wus twenty year 
younger, we'd be right thar. 

Ma E. We shore would, Paw. 

Sassy. Does you 'low to go, Abe? 

Abe. Maybe. 

Sissy. Is you goin', Eph? 

Eph. Not so's you could notice hit. Dis talkin* erbout 
changin' color don't listen good to me* I done talked to white 



8 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

gintlemens whut hab done towered all ober Africa, and dey 
done told me dat eb'ry last one ob dem niggers is black as ink. 
No, sah, I ain't goin' on no ship, not me. 

Sam. There' d be no place for you in Africa nohow . . . 
with one possible exception. 

Eph. Whut'sdat? 

Sam. You might fill the place of the queen's fool. 

Eph. I 'spec' youse mo' fermiliar wif de duties ob dat job. 
. . . Ef I wus to change mah mind and go I'd set mah cap 
for VVidder Look-at-it-an' -kill-it, yessah-ree ! But you needn't 
worry, 'cause I ain't goin'. Ef you wus on de squar you'd 'a' 
fetched erlong a sample ob dem beautiful African women wif 
you. (Enter, back a, Golden Rodd, a pretty octoroon, dressed 
in the topnotch of fashion, and heavily bejewe led ; she sweeps 
majestically to front, c.) 'Fore de Lawd ! 

Sam (rising). What is it, Golden? 

Gold. I got tired waiting in the auto, so I came in. 

Sam. Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present a sample 
of African beauty, — Miss Golden Rodd. 

Eph. I thought it wus the queen, hersef. 

Gold. Her majesty, Lukattiankilli, wouldn't consider that a 
compliment ; she's ten times more beautiful than me. 

Abe. Count Bo-jam, when did you say yo' ship w r ould sail? 

Sam. Day after to-morrow. 

Abe. Count me in ! 

(There is a chorus of " And me, and me, and me," from the 
male guests. Eph kicks himself and appears despondent.') 

Sam. This is Mr. and Mrs. Ermerline, Goldie. 

Pa E. (shaking her hand). Sartainly glad to meet you. 

Gold. Thanks. 

Ma E. (shaking her hand). We shore is delighted. 

(Pa E. and Ma E. converse, r., with Sam and Gold. ; 
Sassy, Sissy and Abe join Eph, at l.) 

Abe. Now you see, you fool nigger, whut yo' hard haid 
done done. 

Eph. I nebber did hab no luck, nohow. 

Sassy. Abe, when you gits to be a millionaire count or 
somethin', will you send for me? 

Abe. I'll come after you in mah special ship. 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 9 

Sissy. Will you bring ernother millionaire erlong with you 
for me, Abe ? 

Eph. Huh ! reckon I ain't good ernuff for you. 

Sissy. Nothin' short of the nobility for mine. 

Ma E. I'm sho' delighted you'll slay to supper. I'll go dis 
minute and put dem goosies on de table. [Exit, r. 

Pa E. After supper you kin sign up all vvhut's goin' to Africa 
wid you. 

Abe. We're all a-goin'. 

(Chorus of male guests: " We shore is! Yes, indeedy ! 
Bet yo' lifer 1 

Sam. How about you, Eph ? 

Sissy. Oh, will you let Eph go, too ? 

Sam. Why, certainly. What do you say, Eph ? 

Eph. Me for dat vvidder queen, Look-at-it-an' -kill-it ! 

(Gold, sings good ragtime song. All Join in chorus.) 

Enter Ma E., r. 

Ma E. Come on, chillun ; supper done ready ! 

(With a cheer, all go to door, r.) 



CURTAIN 



SCENE II 

SCENE. — Exterior drop suggestive of African jungle. Set 
log at c. 

{After rise of curtain, First, Second and Third Guard, 
off k., yell:" Wah-hoo-wah / " Pause. " Wah-hoo-wah!" 
Pause. Then Captain Tuff is heard to answer, off l. : 
" Wah-hoo-wah ! " Again, off r. .- " Wah-hoo-wah /" 
Enter Capt., l., in savage costume, spear in hand.) 

Capt. I-yi-i-yi, ki-yi-yi ! 

(He looks around expectantly.) 

First G. (off r.). Wah-hoo-wah ! 

Capt. Wa-hoo-wah-hoo-wah-hoo-wah ! (Leaps to l. En- 
ter First, Second and Third G., r., shouting: " I-yi-i-yi, 
ki-yi-yi /") Is you niggers seed anything? 

First G. We shore is, Cap'n. 

Capt. Whut you done see ? 

First G. Two strange niggers crawlin* 'long fru de bushes. 

Capt. Whut natiom-nality ? 

First G. Dey favors dat nigger fum Ameriky, Sam Bo-jam, 
whut got de queen to back 'im in dat fool colony enterprise. 

Capt. Hum-bum-ba-zum ! Is dey bearin' weepons? 

First G. Nary a weepon. Dey acts like dey wus mos' 
dead. 

Capt. Den we mus' pounce upon 'urn. Oogoo, you and 
Looloo run off dis heah way (pointing off l.), make a wide 
circumlocution and take 'urn in de back. Zobo and me' 11 hide 
heah and haid 'urn off. When you-all heah me holler, close in 
on 'urn. Now, run erlong ! 

First G. ) T ........ . 

Second G. } ^J 1 ** fa -J*W I [Exeunt, i, 

Capt. Now, Zobo ! 

Third G. (creeping off, l.). I-yi-i-yi-i-yi [Exit, l. 

Capt. Ki-yi-yi ! [Exit, l. 

(After a pause, Abe, very much bedraggled and travel worn, 
enters, r. He goes to log at c, and sits down with a 
deep sigh.) 

10 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY II 

Abe. I wonder ef dat nigger done lost hissef ? (Pause.) 
Eph, is you done lost yo'sef ? 

Eph (crawling in, r.). I reckon so — I dunno. 

Abe. Don't talk so loud. Here's a good log; come rest 
yo'sef. 

Eph. I will ef I kin git mah legs to wuk. 

(Crawls to log; rests against log ; sighs.) 

Abe. Eph, you won't git mad at me, will you, if I axes you 
a question ? 

Eph. I dunno. Try it. 

Abe. Well, then, whut does you think of Africa — whut you 
done seen of it ? How does you like it ? 

Eph. Like a little boy likes a bumble-bee whut's down in 
his pants, but ain't stung 'im yit. . . . Now, I wants to 
ax you a question. 

Abe. Yes ? 

Eph. I done got fermiliar wif de squawl ob tigers and de 
roars ob lions, and to bein' chased by rhin-os-rasses and hip- 
pot-nasses, but whut kind ob animal is it whut yells: " Wah- 
hoo-wah " ? 

Abe. Oh, shucks ! Dat's jest a plain ole ever day hoot- 
owl. 

Eph. How comes hit, den, dat he don't say : " Hoo-hoo- 
hoo-are-you " ? 

Abe. Dat's whut he do say, but he says it in de African 
language. 

Eph. Oh ! 

Abe. Does you reckon we was de onliest ones saved when 
de ship exploded ? 

Eph. De only ones I seed, arter dat submarine sent dat tor- 
peder into our midriff, whut looked like dey had a chance, wus 
Bo-jam and Golden Rodd. Dey wus hangin' on to a door, same 
as we wus. I nebber shall fergit how dem Oklahoma niggers 
wailed when de Royal Shark went down. 

Abe. Maybe we'll git damages sufficient out ob de country 
whut owned dat submarine to make us millionaires. 

Eph. I'd like to swap mah damage claim for a good ham 
sandwidge. How long since we et? 

Abe. Mah mem'ry says three days. 

Eph. Mah stomach says six months. ... I wonder 
whut Pa and Ma Ermerline and Sissy and Sassy's a-doin' ? 
• . . Dey had sence ernuff to stay at home. 



12 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

Abe. I 'spec* dey're all settin' around de table eatin' roast 
goose with drippin' gravy, and greens and taters and 

Eph. Nigger, shet up ! You'll run me clean 'stracted. 
. . . I could bust yo' haid in, anyhow, ebber time I think 
hit wus you fust said you'd go 'long wif dat Bo-jam. . . . 
I talked agin hit right from de start. 

Abe. Yes you did — till Golden Rodd come in. Then you 
wus as keen to come erlong as anybody. But, nebber mind, 
once we find dat African kingdom ob Sam Bo-jam's we'll be 
all right. 

Eph. Like as not when we do find hit thar'll be a elephant 
settin' on de throne and a spotted leopard 'tendin' door. . . . 
Abe, I'm so troubled in sperit, I'm goin' to sing a little song. 

Abe. Go ahead. 

(Eph sings suitable parody. At conclusion of parody First 
and Second G., in the distance, yell : " Wah-hoo-wah / " 

Eph. Did you hear dat ? 
Abe. Don't be afeered, it's jest them owls. 
Eph. Maybe hit's de sperits ob dem Oklahoma niggers 
whut went down in de Royal Shark. 

{Off R. again : " Wah-hoo-wah / ") 

Abe. Them owls does sound mighty queer. 

Eph. Dey sounds so queah dat I'm goin' from heah 1 

Abe. So am I. 

(They start to L., and are confronted by Capt. and Third 
G. who enter l., flourishing spears and yelling ; " Ki-yi- 
ki-yi-yi-yi-yi / ") 

Eph. Hell's broke loose ! Run, Abe ! 

(Abe and Eph run to r., and are confronted by First and 
Second G. who enter r., yelling : " Ki-yi-yi y ki-yi-yi / ") 

Abe {running to a). Help ! Help ! 

{Drops to his knees. ) 

Eph {running to a). Don't shoot ! Don't shoot ! 

{Drops to knees.} 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 1 3 

Abe. We surrender ! 
Eph. We sur-ren-der ! 

{The Guardsmen have been yelling and flourishing their 
spears, surrounding Abe and Eph. They now lower 
their spears and burst into loud laughter.} 

Abe. Whut dem wild men laughin' for ? 

Eph. 'Cause dey's done ketched some soup meat. 

Abe. Tore de Lawd, is dey cannibals ? 

Eph. I reckon so. Dey acts like 'um. . . „ Is you 
gintlemen cannibals ? 

Capt. Naw, we's jest plain niggers like yo'seves. 

Abe (falling on Eph's neck). Thank heavens ! 

Eph. And de sun and moon and all de stars ! (Abe and 
Eph rise.) Whut make y'all jump out at us like dat? 

Capt. I'm Cap'n Tuff ob de queen's royal guards. I mus* 
take you-all pris'ners before her majesty de queen. 

Eph. Queen Look-at-it-an'-kill-it? 

Capt. Perzac'ly. 

Abe. Does de queen's pris'ners git anything to eat? 

Capt. Dey gits roast rhinos'rous meat three times a day. 

Eph. Lead on, Cap'n Tuff ! 

Rhinos'rous meat hit may be tough, 
But dis heah nigger's gwine to stuff 
Until he's shore he's got ernough. 

(Abe and Eph exeunt in custody of the Capt. and his 
men, l.) 



CURTAIN 



SCENE III 

SCENE. — An exterior suggestive of the tropics. At back c. 
are steps leading up to a raised platform, on which there is 
a rustic throne large enough to accommodate two persons. 

{Before the curtain rises, shouting is heard off R.,from 
many throats ; the shouting continues until the curtain 
is tip.) 

Herald {blowing horn). Make way for her mightiness. 
{Cheers.) Lukattiankilli! {Cheers.) By grace ob Gawd, 
queen ob all Africa ! {Cheers.) Empress ob de Foozle-jooks 
and sovereign ob de Arkipelico ! {Prolonged cheers. En- 
ter Her., r., tin horn in hand from which is hanging a pen- 
nant ; he mounts platform and stands at r. of throne. Her. 
blows horn.) The royal guard! {Enter C apt. followed by 
twelve Guardsmen ; they march once around stage and stand 
in tine at L. 3 facing r. Her. blows horn.) Ladies and gin- 
tlemen ob de court! {Enter, K.,flve couples ; they stand in 
line r., facing l. Her. blows horn.) Josh-oshy, the queen's 
fool 1 {Enter, r., Josh-oshy. He jabbers and cuts capers ; 
mounts steps and sits with mock dignity in centre of throne. 
Her. blows horn.) Hot-foot, de dead king's page ! {Enter 
Hot-foot, R., bearing the crown and royal robes of the king. 
He stands at foot of steps, r. Her. blows horn.) Hojo, the 
prime minister! {Enter Hojo, r., carrying in his hand his 
staff of office. He mounts the steps and stands at l. of throne. 
Hek. blows horn.) Her exquisite royal highness, Queen 
Lukattiankilli ! 

Enter Queen Lukattiankilli, r.; her royal robe has long 
trai?i which is held off floor by two little pickaninnies 
dressed as pages. 

Queen. Whut, ho ! Hab we a new king on de frone ob 
our fathers ? 

Josh. 'Tain't de fust time a fool hab set on a frone, friend 
Lukatti. 

{He jumps up and springs lightly to foot of steps l.) 

*4 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 1 5 

Queen. Well said, friend Joshy. {She sweeps majestically 
to throne and sits. The pages arrange her train and sit on 
steps at her feet. Hot. comes to c, faces Queen, kneels and 
exte?ids dead king's robe and crown toward Queen.) Once 
more we are privileged to look on our departed consort's sad 
regalia, to greet our faithful subjects and stout-hearted guards- 
men. 

All. Gawd sabe de queen ! 

(Hot. resumes his place at r.) 

Queen. Hojo, whut bizness ob importance confronts us? 

Ho jo. Your majesty, peace hab been declar'd wif our erst- 
while enemies, de Tootie-loot-i-cans. 

Queen. 'Tis well. 

Hojo. Dem two 'Merica niggers hab been well fed, hab 
recooterated and await audjence wif yo' imperial highness. 

Queen. Let them be brought befo' us. 

(Capt. and two Guardsmen exit, r.) 

Josh. Is yo' heart under lock and key, friend Lukatti ? 
Queen. Why, good Joshy ? 

Josh. Dem 'Merica niggers is powerful handsome; dey 
may be widder-ketchers. 

(Abe and Em enter, r., in custody of Capt. and Guards.) 

Eph. Whut kinder baboon show is dis? 

Abe. Shet up ! 

Capt. Face de queen, and pay her obedience. 

(Capt. and Guards resume their places at l.) 

Eph. I ain't got none of that kinder money. 

Abe. Do as I do, ignoramus. {Faces Queen.) Good- 
even in', Queen. 

Eph. How's mah baby? 

Hojo {indignantly). What ! 

Eph. I means how's yo* health, Queen Look-at-it-an'- 
kill-it? 

Hojo. This is an outrage S Cap'n, arrest them furreigners ! 

(Capt. goes to Abe and Eph. The Queen laughs heartily.) 
Eph. Whut we done done, Cap'n? 



l6 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

Capt. Ernuff to lose yo' heads. 

Eph. Queen Look-at-it-an' -kill-it, me and this other nigger 
don't mean no harm. 

Ho jo. Summon Dashem, the executioner. 

Abe. Lawdy ! Lavvdy ! 

Queen. No, no, dear Hojo, you forgit dat dese niggers are 
'Mericans and unfermiliar wif de manners ob court. 

Eph. Yes, dear Hobo, de queen am right. 

Hojo. As you will, your majesty. Loose them, Cap'n ! 

(Capt. resumes place at l.) 

Eph. Thanks. 

Abe. Will you shet up ! 

Queen. We hab summoned you-all into de royal presence 
to gib a account ob de destruction ob Count Bo-jam's ship, de 
Royal Shark. 

Abe. Well, de ship wus jest a-glidin' thru de water, when 
erlong comes a submarine and blows us all to — to 

Eph. To hallelujah. 

Queen. Was dere any survivors 'sides yo'seves ? 

Abe. We don't know. 

Queen {distressed). When, oh, when, did you last see 
dear Count Bo-jam ? 

Eph. I seen ole Noah — I mean de Count — hangin' on to a 
door and fightin' for his life. 

Queen. Summon Bohunkus, the soothsayer. 

[Exit Capt., r. 

Hojo. You 'Mericans may stand aside. 

Abe. Yes, sah. 

Eph. We'll do dat very thing. 

(Abe and Em stand at r., front.) 

Abe (to Eph). You see, Bo-jam tole de truf 'bout bein' a 
count. 

Eph. But he shore done lied 'bout de color ob dese Africans. 
. . . But, eben at dat, Look-at-it-an' -kill-it sho' do look 
good to me. 

(Capt. reenters, followed by Bohunkus, an old woman.) 

Bo. (to c, bowing low). Whut would yo' highness know 
from de least ob all yo' servants ? 
Eph (to Abe). She's a conjurer. 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 1 7 

Abe. Keep quiet. 

Queen. Kin you tell me aught ob mah good ship, the 
Royal Shark ? 

Bo. She rests a thousand leagues beneath the sea. 

Queen {anxiously). And de survivors ? 

Bo. Alas, dere is but two. 

Queen (putting handkerchief to eyes). You may retire, 
Bohunkus. 

Bo. {backing to r.). Gawd sabe yo' royal highness. Gawd 
sabe yo' royal highness. [Exit, r. 

Queen {removing handkerchief from eyes). 'Tis sad news. 
We had planned great honors for Count Bo-jam. 

Josh. 'Twas eben whispered dat he soon might ascend a 
frone. 

Queen. Yes, we confess, we had some sech intention. 
{Sighs.) But we must not grieve. Summon our dancin' gals 
to soothe our feelin's. {Enter Dancing Girls, r. ; they dance 
before the Queen and exeunt.) Still our grief am unassuaged. 
Hot-foot, you wus ebber de dead king's vocal comforter. Sing 
us a soothin' melody. 

(Hot. sings a lively ragtime song, all joining in the chorus, 
Hot. dancing the chorus.) 

Eph. Dat Hot-foot is some singer, but he can't dance, — 
no, ma'am ! 

Queen. Maybe you would favor us wif a 'Merica break- 
down. 

Eph. Den hit up " Turkey in de Straw/ ' 'cause dis here nig- 
ger's gwine to cut up 1 

{Orchestra plays " Turkey in de Straw," and Eph. dances 
jig ; all the others clap time and express satisfaction with 
his dancing, especially the Queen. At conclusion of dance, 
the Queen takes the staff of office from the prime minis- 
ter* s hand and descends a step or two from platform.) 

Queen. Sech talent shall not go unrewarded ; come here, 
you dancin' prodigy ! 
Eph {going to her). Whut I done done now? 
Queen. Down on your knee ! 

(Eph kneels.) 

Abe. I knowed dat nigger gwine git in trouble I 



1 8 SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 

Queen (touching Eph's left shoulder with staff \ Rise up, 
Ephrum, Duke ob Rump-i-stiddy-bump-i-ty and possessor ob 
de two million acres ob land I had intended for Count Bo-jam. 

All. Gawd sabe de noble duke ! 

(Eph rises.) 

, Eph. Am I dreamin' ? 

Josh. Friend Lukatti, why not complete de job, and gib de 
Duke de Count's warm place in yo' affections ? 

Queen. Whut says Duke Ephrum to dat? 

Eph. Ef you wants me, Look-at-it, I'm yo' meat. 

Queen. 'Tis well. Infest him wid de royal robes. 

(Hot. puts robe and crown o?i Eph.) 

All. Gawd sabe de royal consort ! Gawd sabe de king ! 
Eph. Abe, didn't I say all erlong dat I wus goin' to ketch 
dat widder's fancy? 

Abe. You shore wus borned lucky. 

Enter Sam, r., bedraggled and travel- stained. 

All. Sam Bo-jam ! 

Sam. Lukattiankilli, what's the meaning of this? 

Queen. 'Fore de Lawd, is you a ghost? 

Sam. No, I'm very much alive. 

Queen. Summon de executioner ! 

Sam. What are you going to do ? 

Queen. Hab dat deceitful Bohunkus's head chopped off. 
She told me dat you had gone to de bottom ob de sea wif de 
Royal Shark. So I done publicly plighted mah troff to Eph- 
rum and give him all yo' possessions. 

Eph. He kin hab all his possessions back, 'cep' mah baby 
queen. 

Enter Dashem, r. 

Queen. Dashem ? 

Dash. Yes, yo' majesty? 

Queen. 'Tend to choppin' off Bohunkus's haid. 

Eph. Wait a minute, Dashem ! (Gold, enters r., and 
joins Sam.) Lawdy, here's Miss Golden Rodd ! 

Queen. Who is she ? 

Sam. A young lady from my home town, New Orleans. 
With your majesty's permission I'll make her my wife. 



SAM BO-JAM, AND HIS AFRICAN COLONY 19 

Queen. You have mine. 

Eph. And mine, too. . . . Dashem, you needn't 
bother dat Bohunkus, 'cause she done done me a favor. . . . 
Abe, whut you studyin' erbout ? 

Abe. I wus jest wonderin' where I wus goin' to fit in to all 
these doin's. 

Eph. I makes you mah royal envoy to de United States to 
'quaint Pa and Ma Ermerline, Sassy and Sissy, and de Presi- 
dent at Washington, dat Ephrum Johnson's gwine to sit on de 
frone ob Africa by de side ob Queen Look-at-it-an' -kill-it ! 

(All sing and dance a good closing chorus.) 



CURTAIN 



LOST— A CHAPERON 

A Comedy in Three Acts by Courtney Bruerton and W. S. Maulsby. 
Six male, nine female characters. Costumes, modern ; scenery, an in- 
terior and an exterior. Plays a full evening. A lot of college girls in 
camp lose their chaperon for twenty- four hours, and are provided by a 
camp of college boys across the lake with plenty of excitement. The parts 
are all good, the situations are very funny and the lines full of laughs. 
Recommended for high-school performance. Price, 25 cents 

THE PRIVATE TUTOR 

A Farce in Three Acts by E. J. Whisler. Five male, three female char- 
acters. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two simple interiors. Plays two hours. 
Tells of the endeavors of two college boys to disguise the fact that they have 
been " rusticated " from the family of one of them. Hans Dinklederfer, 
the leader of a German band, trying to make good in the character of a 
private tutor, is a scream. All the parts are good. A capital high-school 
play. Price, 25 cents 

THE REBELLION OF MRS. BARCLAY 

A Comedy of Domestic Life in Two Acts by May E. Countryman. 
Three male, six female characters. Costumes, modern; scenery, easy 
interiors. Plays one hour and three-quarters. A clever and amusing 
comedy with all the parts evenly good. There are many Mr. Barclays all 
over this country, and Mrs. Barclay's method of curing her particular one 
will be sympathetically received. Good Irish comedy parts, male and fe- 
male. Strongly recommended. Price, 25 cents 

THE TRAMPS' CONVENTION 

An Entertainment in One Scene for Male Characters Only by Jessie A. 
Kelley. Seventeen male characters. Costumes, typical tramp dress ; 
scenery, unimportant. Plays an hour and a half. An entertainment in 
the vaudeville class, with possibilities of unlimited fun. Music can be in- 
troduced, if desired, though this is not necessary. The opening is very 
funny and original and the finish — The Ananias Club — can be worked up 
to any extent. Strongly recommended. Price, 25 cents 

THE DAY THAT LINCOLN DIED 

A Play in One Act by Prescott Warren and Will Hutchins. Five male, 
two female characters. Costumes, modern ; scene, an easy exterior. Plays 
thirty minutes. A very effective play suited for a Lincoln Day entertain- 
ment. It offers plenty of comedy, and is a piece that we can heartily 
recommend. Professional stage-rights reserved. Price, 25 cents 

PA'S NEW HOUSEKEEPER 

A Farce in One Act by Charles S. Bird. Three male, two female char- 
acters. Modern costumes ; scenery, a simple interior or none at all. Plays 
forty minutes. Jack Brown, visiting his chum, is tempted by his success 
in college theatricals to make up in the character of the new housekeeper, 
an attractive widow, who is expected but does not arrive. He takes in 
everybody and mixes things up generally. All the parts are first rate and 
the piece full of laughs. Strongly recommended. Frice % /j ants 



JOLLY PLAYS FOR HOLIDAYS 

A Collection of Christmas Plays for Children 
By Carolyn Wells 

COMPRISING 

The Day Before Christmas. Nine males, eight females. 

A Substitute for Santa Claus. Five males, two females. 

Is Santa Claus a Fraud ? Seventeen males, nine females and chorus. 

The Greatest Day of the Year. Seven males, nineteen females. 

Christmas Gifts of ail Nations. Three males, three females and chorus. 

The Greatest Gift. Ten males, eleven females. 

The plays composing this collection are reprinted from " The Ladies' 
Home Journal " of Philadelphia and other popular magazines in answer 
to a persistent demand for them for acting purposes. Miss Wells' work 
requires no introduction to a public already familiar with her wit, her hu- 
mor and her graceful and abundant fancy, all of which attractive qualities 
are amply exemplified in the above collection. These plays are intended 
to be acted by young people at the Christmas season, and give ample sug- 
gestions for costuming, decoration and other details of stage production. 
These demands are sufficiently elastic in character, however, to make it 
possible to shorten and simplify the performance to accommodate almost 
any stage or circumstances. The music called for is of the simplest and 
most popular sort, such as is to be found in every household and memory. 
This collection can be strongly recommended. 

Price y cloth, post-paid by mail, 60 cents net 



CHEERY COMEDIES FOR CHRISTMAS 

A Collection of Plays, Pantomimes, Tableaux, Readings, 

Recitations, Illustrated Poems, etc., Suitable for 

Use at Christmas 

By Edith M. Burrows, Gertrude M. Henderson, and others 

CONTENTS 

The Awakening of Christmas. A Christmas Operetta for children. 

Twenty-five boys and thirty-two girls, or may be played by a less 

number if desired. Scenery and costumes easily arranged ; music 

selected from popular sources. 
A Christmas Strike. A very easy entertainment for four boys and three 

girls. 
Santa's Surprise. For thirty-three children, or less if desired, and a man 

to impersonate Santa Claus. 
The Syndicated Santa Claus. For three males and two females (adults), 

who speak, and any number of children. 
Krias Kr ingle's Panorama. A collection of tableaux, recitations, etc. 

Price, 23 cents 



PICKING A WINNER 
A Farce in Three Acts 

By Mac Pherson Janney 
Nine males, five females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two interiors. 
Plays two hours. Three foreign noblemen in pursuit of the millions of an 
American heiress disguise themselves as a cook, a chauffeur, and a butler, 
and enter her employ. The police force of McNabb, 111., embodied in a 
rustic disciple of Sherlock Holmes, misconceives them and causes a lot ot 
fun for everybody but them. Very funny and original and strongly 
recommended. Professional rights reserved. Price, 23 cents 

CHARACTERS 

Sir Francis Mac Donald, who wants Blanche. 

Count Alexandre, who wants Blanche s money. 

The Earl of Norton, also desirous of Blanches coin. 

The Grand Duke Ruffievitch, equally keen after Blanche s 

wealth. 
Col. Arthur Hopkins, the police force of McNabb, Illinois. 
Fred 1 

Mervyn > three gilded youths. 
Frank ) 

Hawkins, Lady Janet 's butler. 
Blanche Kane, an American heiress. 
Lady Janet Mac Donald, Sir Francis aunt. 
Isabelle Foster j 

Olga Foster > three American heiresses. 
Stella Foster ] 

THE FIRST NATIONAL BOOT 

A Farce in Two Acts 
By M. G. 

Seven males, two females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, a single in- 
terior. Plays one hour. Intended to be played by male actors only. 
Isry Ebbetts's distrust of banks leads him to keep his money in a rubber 
boot. The fact that he never banks his receipts and his known possession 
of the " Ebbetts fortune " make him an object of interest to Nine-Fingered 
Pete and others, including two suffragettes with prohibition ideas. His 
troubles are many, but he comes out all right. Very funny, Can be 
recommended. Price, ij cents 

CHARACTERS 

"Isry" Ebbetts, owner of Hamderi s Center Store. 
Eddy Rias, his clerk. 

Andrew Strong, a mysterious stranger from Portland. 
Francesca Willets ) members of Hamderis 
Edwina Bemis J Reform League. 

Archenbachus Herodotus Snooze, a member of Pinkunis De- 
tective Agency. 
Foggerty Young, towri constable. 
Thomas Rustan, a practical joker. 
Squire Peckham, chairman of the town council* 
Farmers. 



COLLEGE DAYS 

A College Comedy in Three Acts 
By George M. Rosener 

Ten males, four females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, two interiors 
and an exterior. Plays two hours. Quincy Jordan, the son of a tyrannical 
farmer, wins a scholarship offered by a prominent newspaper and throws 
off the paternal yoke. At Westward College, which he has chosen be- 
cause the girl he loves is there, he is at first disadvantaged by his circum- 
stances, but he soon makes good both with head and fists and not cnly 
defeats the plot for his downfall that his rivals lay for him, but comes out 
a victor in college, wins the girl he loves, and carries all before him. A 
fine piece with many fine parts ; strongly recommended. Lots of come ly. 
Professional rights reserved. 

Price, 25 cents 
CHARACTERS 
Quincy Jordan, a farmer. 
Quincy, Jr., his son. 
Squire Drake, a rich farmer. 
Jerome, his son. 
Uncle Hez, a town character. 
Poor House Onnie, another. 
Paul Prye, the bully. 
Professor Rex, a teacher. 
Hal Dexter, a student. 
Harry C. Graham, a politician. 
Jim Brady, a reporter. 
Jersey, Quincy Jordan s wife. 
Violet, Squire Drake s daughter. 
Aunt Sally, a town character. 
Any number of students. 
SYNOPSIS 
Act I. — Exterior of Quincy Jordan's farm, near the summet 
school of Westward College. 

Act II. — Exterior of Westward College. The home of Professor 
Rex. 
Act III. — Quincy, Jr.'s, law office out West four years later. 

THE COLLEGE POLITICIAN 

A College Farce Comedy in Three Acts 
By H. W. Weis and D. T. Howard 
^ Sixteen males, five females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three inte- 
riors. Plays two hours. Ted Kingsley, an outsider, applies the political 
methods of the outside world to the problem of winning the election for 
football manager in his college and, after an exciting campaign in which 
he shows great ability in this line and sets the college on end, he wins the 
office and the sister of his rival at one blow. An exciting play, with the 
true college atmosphere. Lots of good parts ; not difficult j well recom 
mended. Price, 13 cents 



JL lit. Pinero's Plays 

Price, 50 0c:its each 

Mill PHANNFI I* la y in Four Acts, Six males, five females. 
lYlll/-\^0/\nii£iLi Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors, 
Plays two and a half hours. 

THE NOTORIOUS MRS. EBBSMITH i^r^Tt 

males, five females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interiors. 
Plays a full evening. 

THF PRHFIir'ATF Play in Four Acts. Seven males. fi\*e 
* "*-« * I\V/r LilVlri 1 £4 females. Scenery, three interiors, rather 
elaborate ; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

THF QfHflfll MIQTRFQQ Farce in Three Acts. Nine males, 
lilLi J^IlUULiiUlOIIVLiOO seven females. Costumes, mod- 
ern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. 

THE SECOND MRS. TANQUERAY &*,££*& 

females. Costumes, modern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a 
full evening. 

^SWFFT I AVFNHFR Comedyin Three Acts. Seven males, 
O Yf LdLi 1 Ld\ Y LjI\ULjI\ f our females. Scene, a single interior, 
costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 



THE THUNDERBOLT 



Comedy in Four Acts. Ten males, 
nine females. Scenery, three interi- 
ors; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 



THF TIMFS ^ omec *y ^ n Four Acts. Six males, seven females. 
1 rid 1 1 If 1 Li O Scene, a single interior ; costumes, modern. Plays 
a full evening. 

THF WFAKTU <JFY Comedy in Three Acts. Eight males, 
IllEi TV LirvIVE<I\ OIL A eight females. Costumes, modern; 
scenery, two interiors. Plays a full evening. 

A WIFE WITHOUT A SMILE K^SX»i?£ 

Costumes, modern ; scene, a single interior. Plays a full evening,, 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

Salter H* pafeer & Company 

NOo 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 

015 825 850 A # 



Ct)e Militant barren Ctatton 
of Paps 

$tht, 15 €mt& €arf) 



A^ Yftll I I¥F IT Comed y in Five Acts. Thirteen males, four 
A J 1UU LlIvL II females. Costumes, picturesque ; scenery, va- 
ried. Plays a full evening. 

C A MIT IF £ >rama in Five Acts. Nine males, five females. Cos- 
vAWlIl^Liw tumes, modern ; scenery, varied. Plays a full evening. 

INfiflMAft Pl a y i n Five Acts. Thirteen males, three females. 
ll!UUlTl/il\ Scenery varied ; costumes, Greek. Plays a full evening. 

MABY STUART Tra g ed y in Five Acts. Thirteen males, four fe- 
IH 4I\1 J IUAA1 males, and supernumeraries. Costumes, of the 
period ; scenery, varied and elaborate. Plays a full evening. 

THE MERCHANT OF VENICE SSSSjfiSSS^SS: &£££ 

picturesque ; scenery varied. Plays a full evening. 

RlfHFI IFI1 P la Y i* 1 Five Acts. Fifteen males, two females. Scen- 
1MWIILLILU er y elaborate ; costumes of the period. Plays a full 
evening. 

THF RIVAI S Comedy in Five Acts. Nine males, five females. 
llllv AM ALiiJ Scenery varied; costumes of the period. Plays a 
full evening. 

SHE STAftPQ TO rnVHTIFP Comedv in Five Acts. Fifteen 
JUL, JIVUrj IV VUliyUER males, four females. Scenery va- 
ried ; costumes of the period. Plays a full evening. 

TWELFTH NIGHT; OR, WHAT YOU WILL SrttJSS 

three females. Costumes, picturesque ; scenery, varied. Plays a 
full evening. 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

Salter 1$, OBafeer & Company 

No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 

8. J. PARKHILL ft CO.. PRINTERS, BOSTON. U.S.A. 



